How to have the perfect morning…

I see blog posts, magazine articles and pinterest boards dedicated to this topic and it’s one of my major pet peeves. The tips and tricks may work for some (a minority I must assume due to my naturally pessimistic nature) yet I cannot help but find them absurd. Some of these little ‘hacks’ which keep popping up include:

1) Set your alarm ten minutes early. No. Need I explain?
2) Meditate. Now to be fair, I do think this is a good suggestion, unfortunately I have the attention span of a small child so this is near to impossible.
3) Drink 54653 litres of lemon water. I have tried this and I just feel horribly bloated and need to pee every thirteen minutes for the remainder of the day.
4) Do ten minutes of cardio. So you’ve woken me up earlier than necessary just so I can get sweaty and tired, and probably tempted to roll back into bed.
5) Make this quick healthy egg white veggie omlette packed with veggies. I like an omlette, and I like my vegetables, but what do I do with the yolks? And do I really have time to chop up veg after my ten minutes of jumping jacks (or even afford vegetables as a student)? Give me porridge or cereal any day.
6) Blend up a green smoothie to take to work. Apparently my body will thank me, but all I can think about is the amount of washing up which is now piling up on my units, and the fact I don’t want to look like the noob striding to work with a green juice, yoga mat and inner zen vibe.

I would love for my morning to resemble this, however I have neither the time or the inclination. Who are these people and how can I have their life?

My top three tips for a BEARABLE morning are as follows….

  1. Try and prepare breakfast and an outfit the night before. That way you could always set your alarm ten minutes later…..
  2. Scrub your teeth. Why is this never in these routines?! How do people go about their daily life not having scrubbed their pearly whites? It’s important children, so take care.
  3. Do what makes you happy. If that’s exercise, drinking jugs of coffee, consuming you weight in fruit, do that. No better way to start your day than with a smile (so cliche, I apologise).
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Go forth and conquer my friends. Have a great morning and a great day xo

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